Pop Goes The Oil Well.

Well boys and girls, the world will soon be safe from nasty old oil companies and broken oil wells. Yes boys and girls, a nice man by the name of Mr Brownfield will fix it all. In Mr. Brownfield's neighborhood, we don't stop oil leaks, we blow them up. That's right kids. To solve the problem in the Gulf of Mexico caused by an exploded oil platform and a broken oil pipe that is gushing oil under extreme pressure that for millions of years has been held deep under ground by a mile or two of impermeable rock. Now children, impermeable means nothing can get through it. His plan is to explode this impermeable rock, pulverizing it to block the well. And children, pulverizing means to break it up into dust. Of course the rock would no longer be impermeable, which means that stuff can then get through it, but that's just a small matter. It only means that the oil can then get through it and since it's under tremendous pressure, you can bet it will, except like I said a few weeks ago, it'll get through in a much larger area. So, you see, there's nothing to worry about, so quit crying and keep digging your bomb shelter. There's plenty of time because for this to work, they have to drill another new well alongside the one that's leaking. No, not the ones they're already drilling, another one. So they have a place to put the explosives. And besides, Mr Brownfield knows what he's talking about because he was a nuclear submariner. Which means he was involved with the operation of nuclear submarines and he studied how torpedoes worked. So now, don't you feel silly worrying about this plan?