What Makes A Corporation A Person?

I just read the other day, or maybe it was yesterday, that there is a bill in some state house up for consideration that classifies a fertilized egg as a human person. Now before you jump all over me, let me say that this entry is not about whether or not this makes sense. And by the way it is referring to human eggs, so you can go ahead and have your chicken eggs over easy in the morning. Personally I like mine poached, on toast. No, rather, it got me to thinking about corporations.  Ya see, human persons start out as fertilized eggs. So I was wondering, how do corporations start out? I mean if they are people too, then how do they start out? Do they face the same dangers of not being conceived if birth control measures are used? And once born, do they breast feed or are they bottle fed? These are the kinds of questions that keep me up at night. Like, if human children have pediatricians, do corporation people have oaktreeicians? Where do you take a sick corporation? And at what age do corporations start school? Are they even required to attend public school? Does all of this sound silly? Well just how do you think it sounds calling corporations, people? If you have a house warming party, would it be improper to not invite your next door neighbor, Walmart? And what about your daughter's wedding? If DuPont is attending, I'm not. And when Jiffy-Lube moves in on the other side, there goes the neighborhood. That's the problem with the Supreme Court. They always leave more questions unanswered than they answer. Wouldn't it be nice if they just once gave us an answer that made sense and actually settled the matter once and for all. But no, they have to beat around the bush, presumably waiting to hear how the party in favor wants it settled. Supreme Court Justices are nominated by the President and confirmed by the Senate as you all know. Maybe they should be appointed by the corporate people and confirmed by the tree it took to give birth to that corporation. That's because ,after all, they're just a piece of paper, people.