More Campaign Nits And Lice.

I'm continuing my campaign for president and have noticed that many, many successful politicians have participated in illicit relations. As a long time photographer, I've decided to venture into that arena. That's right folks, good news indeed. My only problem has been to get someone to review the photos. I finally got an art critic to agree to take a peak, but the price was quite steep at $5 per photo. That problem was  quickly solved after she got a look at them. Her response was that no amount of money could compensate her for looking at any more. Obviously I was pleased that she thought so highly of me and my physique. I found a new looker to check them out. Although she spelled it with an "H". One look though and she upped her price to $1000 per picture which has priced her out of the market. But it's good to know the value of them, anyway. I, nevertheless, remain hopeful.
I must say, I'm a bit disappointed that I wasn't invited to participate in Monday night's Republican Presidential candidate Debate. Especially when you consider that one person wasn't even a declared candidate until after the debate began. I speak of course, of Michelle Bachmann. It may be because she is the only female in the running. I know that to be true, because I tried to fill that position myself, but was turned down on the flimsy excuse that I wasn't female. It seems that the lame stream media is out to get me. Or perhaps they're out to ignore me. Which would be even worse. Well, as soon as my photos are released to the media, that will change, I'm certain.
My PAC, P.I.M.P. is doing well and I can tell you now, that there are only 240, prime cherry blossom time reservation nights left for the Lincoln bedroom, so you need to get your donations in quickly if you want to sleep over. I plan to change all the art work in that room with some of my best photos. Poster sized. It should add some real class to a room that has been neglected for far too long.
As for my platform, I've added jobs creation, including that of official photographer. And photo critic. Don't forget that one. Another plank I've been considering is war. War isn't all it's cracked up to be. People going around shooting off their mouths and guns. One of these days somebody's gonna get hurt, mark my word, and then watch out. And what if one of these times we don't win? Huh? What then? You'll find hawk feathers all over the place. No photos are gonna solve that little problem.